Would You Catch a Grenade for Me?

A conversation I recently had with the boyfriend reminded me of how differently men and women are wired. He had just gotten back from visiting family and told me he had an interesting conversation with his male cousin about the Bruno Mars’ song “Grenade.”  To the two of them, it was the dumbest song ever because all of the actions Bruno Mars’ describes taking for his love are just absolutely pointless. I listened as he commented on these lyrics in particular:

I’d catch a grenade for you
Throw my hand on a blade for you
Jump in front of a train for you
You know I’d do anything for you
I would go through all this pain
Take a bullet straight through my brain
Yes, I would die for you, baby
But you won’t do the same

To him, all of these actions didn’t make any sense. What would catching a grenade do? She’s probably standing nearby, so either way, they’re both dead. How does cutting your hand on a knife prove anything? Oooh, look at me, I’m bleeding for you! And why the hell would anyone jump in front of a train? What purpose does that serve?!

I know I shouldn’t have been surprised, but I really was a little taken aback by how literally men can take things sometimes. I told him that most women don’t just take those statements at face value — they imagine the scenario and tell themselves a story about it. Like he isn’t just shooting himself in the head — he’s jumping in front of gunfire to save her. Or he’s jumping in front of a knife to make sure she isn’t the one who’s stabbed. Or he’s intercepting the grenade to save her life, probably at the sacrifice of his own.

The train one … I don’t know, Bruno. Not sure what you were going for there.

What I got out of this conversation is that sometimes things really are that simple to men. Women over-analyze everything. And I mean EVERYTHING. And this is usually the cause of some pretty major arguments because most men have an unemotional, cut-and-dry view, which most women interpret as insensitive and uncaring. Now, I’m not excusing insensitive, uncaring men. I’ve dated enough of those to know that, unlike Bigfoot, they really do exist. But it’s good to remember that men are oftentimes much simpler than we women make them out to be. Which means sometimes … scratch that … most of the time, it’s best to just tell them what we’re thinking/feeling/needing/wanting instead of waiting for them to figure it out. Because while you’re stewing over why he’s not doing what you want him to do (because if he really loves you, he’d just know, right?), he’s watching football. And he’s not imagining that oblong pigskin is a grenade he’s catching to save his one-and-only love. He’s hoping that last play won’t lose the game for his team.

I’ll leave you with Bruno Mars’ “Grenade” music video. Unfortunately, the pointlessness of the video (and the way it ends), proved  the boyfriend right about the song, but that doesn’t change why I think most women find it appealing. Enjoy.

Love and (you guessed it) grenades,

Mika

~ by Mika Doyle on February 18, 2011.

13 Responses to “Would You Catch a Grenade for Me?”

  1. It’s my first time blogging and I’m not quite sure what to be writing about, but I wanted to let you know that this is exactly my mind frame. We view what he is saying in a different light than what men do. And I really really enjoyed reading this and your a great example of what a blogger should be. Thank you for sharing : )

    • Thanks for reading, Jaklyn! I’m glad you enjoyed the post. Good luck with your new blogging adventures :).

  2. I love this topic. I myself have had a similar conversation with a close guy friend. I said really in most (I emphasize, MOST) cases when a guy tells you something he means it. There usually isn’t some hidden meaning in it. I really enjoyed reading your post! 🙂

    • Thanks, Lazra! I agree with the emphasis on “most.” Male or female, there are manipulative people out there, but in most of the day-to-day misunderstandings men and women have, many times it has to do with the way we women tend to seek a greater meaning in everything when the simplest answer really is the truth.

  3. I’d suggest that if you actually listen the lyrics of just about any pop song, you’ll grow dumber. And yes, most of us really do mean what we say… unless we’re trying to hook-up. Then we say whatever seems to work. Probably the most important thing to remember is that when we say, “I don’t care,” we really don’t care. And when we say we are not thinking about anything, we truly have just a blank in our head.

    • Great to have the male perspective on this, Eric! Thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts. I love this in particular: “Probably the most important thing to remember is that when we say, ‘I don’t care,’ we really don’t care. And when we say we are not thinking about anything, we truly have just a blank in our head.” You said exactly what I was trying to say!

  4. This song cracks me up. Even as a pretty romantic girl, I think these lyrics are ridiculous. First of all, I don’t want the stress of someone catching a grenade for me. If there are grenades being thrown in my general direction, I probably am a secret agent spy or am dating someone in the mafia. Either way, I have bigger concerns on my hands than a relationship.

    Obviously, that’s taking the song literally.

    But, figuratively, I don’t know if I like it either. I want someone who loves me dearly but also values himself. What good does it do for me if he takes his life for me? Now I have to deal with the guilt and probably his mother and I don’t know if I’m okay with either of those things. Giving up a life for a child? Sure, romantic. Giving up your life to save me?? A little creepy… maybe that’s just me.

    -Caitlin

    • HA this comment was hilarious! Especially this: “Now I have to deal with the guilt and probably his mother…” The song certainly does call up images of the modern-day knight-in-shining-armor, a very cliche and archaic ideal in this day and age.

  5. Caitlin and Mary G. have their own little comedy bit on this one… 😉

  6. Mika, Mika, Mika, my dear. You really have a gift. I loved this blog post. I totally think you should write a book. This post actually helped me realize a few things about my own relationship, so thanks.

    And you’re so right…Bruno Mars is apparently the only man who understands women, hahah. No wonder he is such a hit with the ladies.

    p.s.: V loves Bruno Mars. I sometimes tell him I think he is the original Bruno Mars. Did you know he’s half Filipino?

    Fabulous post.

    • Aw, thanks! I’m actually launching my own blog pretty soon. I’m in the site design stage but hope to start posting in May. I’ll keep you updated on it in case you want to check it out.

      And I didn’t know Bruno was half Filipino! It’s always cool to hear about other mixed Asians because we’re seem to few and far between. At least in the Midwest.

  7. I totally understand these lyrics.. Cause creepy enough it seems to be my boyfriend singing this to me… =(
    Makes me sad. I’m in such a horrible situation!
    So people.. don’t think this is foolish! It happens like this! In my life, it could even be interpretated litterally…
    Okay, enough about myself and my problems.
    I think, in the lives of other people.. Yes, then it might seem a little too much ; )
    But how romantic if you hear this and you are a girl who imagines a boy singing this to you.. Your heart would melt =)
    Nice blog!

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